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Those who use phrases similar to “hoping to be friends first” are usually looking for fun rather than commitment, says Laurie Davis, founder and CEO of e Flirt Expert, and author of You can also weed out the casual sex seekers by looking at the context around your planned date: Is he willing to set up a date for a week or so later?

Meet for coffee or in a place where you can hear each other talk?

For instance, two people meet at a party where they have been drinking; they flirt and engage in sexual behaviors from kissing to sexual intercourse, with no commitment to a future relationship.Carolyn Bradshaw from James Madison University in Virginia and colleagues explored the reasons that motivate college men and women to hook up or to date, as well as the perceived relative benefits and costs of the two practices.Bradshaw and team exposed 150 female and 71 male college students from a southern, public American university to a variety of dating or hooking up situations, such as when there was potential for a relationship, when their partner had a great personality and when drinking was involved.A hookup culture is one that accepts and encourages casual sexual encounters, including one-night stands and other related activity, which focus on physical pleasure without necessarily including emotional bonding or long-term commitment.Adolescents, emerging adults, men and women engage in hookups for a variety of reasons, which may range from instant physical gratification, to fulfillment of emotional needs, to using it as a means of finding a long-term romantic partner.

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